Thirty Eight Years!!!

Yeah wow hubby and I have been married 38 yrs today!!!!!  You know I think back to the day we were married and never in my wildest dreams would I have thought we would go through so much and come out winners and with such a happy wonderful life, but look we did.

Ron I thank you for all these years you have stuck by me.  We have had our ups and downs but survived.  We never gave up, never walked away from each other and that only made our marriage that much stonger.  So today I will say “I do” all over again and here’s to another 38 years.

We have raised our two children and watched their lives blossom and are so proud of both of them.  I will be honest here ,for awhile we did have our doubts about our son!! He was more than a handful and yeah you all know, the twins are solid proof of that.  But in the long run he finally grew up and is back in the “family” groove and hard working groove, so all is good.  Even in his “miserable stage” we never stopped loving him and always had hope, so it does pay to “hang in there”

Our daughter so proud of her, her accomplishments her two beautiful daughters and her hubby.  She has always pushed forward, done right and was total opposite of her older brother.

Grandchildren aren’t we  blessed?  Come on four of them all GREAT!!!  Yup like father like son, we did have our share of trouble with Bryce, but again like father like son, he is on the path to greatness now.

A loving home is what we have, not just a roof over our heads.  Hubby and I tell each other everything, and imagine still give good by kisses etc.  Yeah all these years it has been what we do.

Now our bowling dates each night, oh so great. It has brought us even closer if that’s possible.  We just enjoy and look forward to that time.  We chat, discuss any issues, joke, challenge each other, high five each other and yep even stop to dance around to a good song playing while we bowl.

We have our Saturday evening movie date nights, and just seem to do everything together.  We are one and so is our family.  I consider myself the luckiest person on earth and I know in 38 more years it will be even better.  Hey by then our wheelchairs will have the capacity to dance to our favorite song while we are Wii bowling, shakey arms and all!!!  

Uh Oh

 Mama has one nasty head cold, poor baby.  Here I am leaving for NY day after tomorrow and she is just not feeling well.  She hasn’t complained at all, that’s not her, she never complains, but she is losing her voice.  Her eyes look like the eyes of those hush puppy dogs, so droopy and sick looking and her nose.  Oh my gosh that nose, anyone got a bucket I can tie under it?  It is like a faucet going full blast.

I have vicks’ed her up but good, fed her chicken noodle soup, juice, water and kept her warm and dry.  I hope I can get it under control.  Thank goodness no fever, if she had one, trust me my trip would be cancelled in a heartbeat.  She comes first no matter what, but thank goodness it’s just the runny nose and the sneezing galore and coughing.

Now hubby had sent an email around and  I believe I did forward it to all, about putting vicks on the bottom of your feet then white socks. Oh yeah that’s the first thing I did.  Her coughing subsides but the nose, run run run. Yesterday she slept most of the afternoon in her recliner and I was constantly wiping her nose, yeah even in her sleep it runs  I swear I went through a box of tissue in just one afternoon.

Then last night did I ever make a huge boo boo with her.  About an hour or so before bed I thought, “yeah give her Nyquil.”  Great idea and I know that will help, so I proceed to give it to her, durrrrrrrrrrr Sherry!!!!  Hahaha not funny but it is, and if you all could have seen me, you would have had one good laugh for the day.

So she had her Nyquil and then come time to get her out of the recliner and in ready for bed hahaha yikes.  My mama was doped up, in a stupor, higher than a kite, the nyquil had kicked in and oh loopey loop for sure.  She was basically like a rag doll, didn’t want to stand, walk, move nadda.  So yeah I was flopping her from the recliner to the wheelchair, to the toilet, to the wheelchair and then thank goodness to her bed.  The entire time she’s a bobbin her head like a fishing bob in a rough lake.  Limp as a wet dish rag and no cooperating at all.  Arms in her nightgown??!!!  Hahha okay ever dress a barbie doll?  The arms won’t bend so you basically almost rip the clothes to get them on, mmmm I had best check her nightgown this morning.

Rubber legs??!!!  Those two hummers she uses to stand on, useless as anything.  So after all is said and done, mama all tucked in bed, safe and warm, I think.   Damn can one get drunk on Nyquil???  She sure acted like she was!!!  Hahaha I was playing dress up with a literal life size rubberized barbie doll last night!!!

I made sure my barbie doll was aok and she was asleep before I left the room, or was it passed out??? Either way she was safe, bed rail up, all tucked in and me well I had to collapse just for a minute.  Then ,yep you guessed it, Wii wii time!!!!     Bowled til midnight and now look a new day and mmm mabye no Nyquil tonight until I have mama IN bed for the night.  Sure will make it easier for me!!!

I hope her cold is improving today time will tell, but I know my trip depends soley on her.

All Heart

So I watched Stephanie’s video, the young mother that has cancer, then I read some of the posts on here, and read them aloud to hubby.  Kellie you wrote an awesome post and Stephanie your video so brave.

Hubby was in the middle of shampooing the carpets, I just returned from the dreaded foot doctor and you know , all that is so trivial compared to what Stephanie is going through.  Hubby and I just sat in silence, thinking, and the I had to say something.  The silence was literally deafening to me.  We both had Stephanie on our minds and our hearts just hurt for her, yet we both admitted we admire that young girls strength and her faith.  She has managed to touch so many lives and like the snowball effect I see that everyone’s hearts are hurting and at the same time are “beating just a bit faster.”  Hearts that have always been full of love yet never conveying that love are now spilling over.  Hearts that can reach out and actually touch someone’s lives in a way you never imagined.

One 28 yr old girl literally stopped hubby and I in our tracks.  We had our silence then our discussion.  We know all that has gone on in our lives just seem humdrum compared to what that young girl is going through.

Like you Kellie, we realized that we don’t spend enough time showing our feelings, treasuring them like we should.  We are extremely fortunate here in this house because we have three generations living here.  Three different worlds so to speak but once you sit, think, your heart opens that much more and the generation gap disappears.   Stephanie made us realize that we are only here on earth as long as God wants us to be, we don’t chose our end, He does.  So we need to live each day to the fullest, treasurer one another and come the end of the day, thank God for giving us those 24 hours.

I was so skeptical about starting this blog, but you know I am so glad I did.  Each and everyone of you that read this, and I read yours are near and dear to me now.  I so would love to meet you all and  your wonderful families.  Your support and compassion is over whelming and I know with all of us pouring our hearts out to Stephanie, she too can feel the greatness of this blogging world.

Everyone take one minute say a prayer for Stephanie and her family, then always keep her in that special place in your heart.  But don’t let her words get to you one day and forget the next.  Show your love keep your hearts open and you know the saying “pay it forward.”

Do I Dare???!!!!

That’s my big question of the day!!!  Tomorrow morning at 8am I have an appointment with a podiatrist just because at Madigan they don’t see “dependents” so we are referred to the outside.  My main provider ( doctor) at Madigan make the referral because of the stimulator I have in my leg and just so I am under a doctors care.  My great great great foot doctor no longer accepts Tri-Care ( our military insurance) so I have been like in limbo for awhile.

So I get a call from Madigan central appointments stating my referral is in and I need to call this foot clinic for an appointment.  No biggie, right? Wrong!!  The foot clinic is the same on that started all this mess with my foot mmm 8 years ago.  I mean I despise that place so much, when we just drive by I get sick to my stomach!!!!  You can imagine how I felt when I found out where my referral was!!!

I call for the appointment but before I even make it I ask what doctors are there.  Then I proceed to tell the girl a brief summary of my history and how much I despise that place, tell her it makes me ill just thinking about walking through those doors.

She assured me they are no way affiliated with the old Spanaway Foot and Ankle Clinic as it was called back then, and the Dr Davis is not there.  She told me that even the office personnel is different.  She told me it’s a separate place and she has faith in the doctors or else she wouldn’t be working there, so yeah I made the appointment.

Okay silly of me maybe, maybe not but it has been just eating at me all weekend.  My fear of that place, they are going to make me worse, they are going  to tug, pull etc at my foot and the doctor is going to be another “bozo” that has no clue.  The mind is a funny thing, cause I know mine is thinking nothing but the worst.

To be brief for you that no doubt think I am absolutely nuts right about now, here’s a rundown.  I went to the clinic through a Madigan referral 8 yrs ago due to heel pain.  I had x-rays, an MRI and yes even a second opinion.  The diagnosis I needed surgery to for tarpal tunnel.  The surgery was day surgery only supposed to last about a half hour.  Simple surgery sort of like a tarasal tunnel one.  No problem, I worked retail and just needed my foot better!!!

Have surgery, hubby in waiting room, waits for oh almost TWO hours for this 30 min surgery, no one telling him a thing!!!  Dr finally comes out and told him it was more than tarasl tunnel, I had an extra muscle so he REMOVED it.

I go home with a bandage bigger than my house, hobbling along in horrific pain, but hey I’m tough I can hang.  Not so, after about 2 weeks I still couldn’t walk, and my so called doctor( the hummer is more a quack) told me I was being foolish, drop the crutches and walk, so the pain will go away.  I so remember staying up all night in pain and tears, practicing walking up and down the hallway, just to show that fool that I could do it.  Problem my foot wouldn’t go flat on the floor and the pain was just sickening.  But I walked!!!!!

K I kept complaining of the pain, the quack kept shooting steroid shots in the incision  and telling me it would take time.  Six months later I finally got another doctor and then another and yeah even another.  In between I was in therapy, had six months of serial casting ( once a week Wed they would take the cast off, try to push my foot straight and then recast in that new position) That alone was hell on earth and as soon as the cast came off, my foot went crooked again.

I was diagnosed as having RSDS ( Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Syndrome).  It’s nerve damage and mm well okay imagine this:  walking 24/7 barefoot on broken sharp glass, yeah that’s sorta what it’s like on my foot , bottom, side ,top and some parts of my leg.  With RSDS therapy is wrong, serial casting wrong, and well walking extremely painful.  The crooked foot, nope can’t be fixed due to NO MUSCLE.  Remember the quack said I had an EXTRA one, not, I needed the one he removed.

Anyway too many surgeries later here I am , stimulator to help with the pain and on 3000mg per day to help ease the pain and it only gets worse instead of better, cause there’s not cure (YET) for RSDS.

Now I have to go back to where all this mess started and my life had to be totally altered in order for me to function!!!!  Yeah today my nerves are tight my mind reeling and I am wondering “Do I Dare?”

Oh Geeze!!

Too funny , this generator saga continues!!!  Sure enough our wind storm hit and bam no power for the majority of the afternoon yesterday.  Hubby must have called 10 or so times to see if he needed to walk me through using the generator.  I wasn’t being a snot or being stubborn, but I didn’t see the need for it right away and I think I disappointed him.  I told him if we still have no power when it starts getting dark, of course the generator will be fired up, but in the daylight all was fine.  Power was restored around 3:30/4:pm so all was well.  Next time just to keep him happy, yep I will fire that hummer up and make him happy!!  

Okay a shout out to anyone that can help me!!!  I have been surfing the net for an N scale train car with WASHINGTON on it.  Dang I swear they have everything but WA    So if any of you have any idea of website for electric trains etc, I would appreciate a heads up.  I am so frustrated I am getting close to the point of getting a plain ol train car and painting WASHINGTON on it, hahaha.  It for a Christmas gift and you know how you get the one thing in your head, and hate to give up on it until you have exhausted every avenue there is in the world!!!!  That’s me crazy like that, I want what I want and so don’t want to settle for anything less!!!!

Dang one week from today I will be on my way to NY!!!  It seemed so far off and now  tick tock, I need to get things in order around here.  Write mama’s routine down for her caregivers, line up a meal plan for each day, then of course shop for the groceries that go with the menu.   My house needs to be in tip top shape cause mm hate to have people here and have the dust bunnies attack them ya know?  I have some dust bunnies right now that would scare the hell out of anyone that walks in the door.  I really shouldn’t admit that should I???

I am trying to decide which camera to take with me.  I so want to take them all haha but I would have to carry them around, and me I travel with a light carry on.  I know those airports you walk for a hundred miles to get to your next gate.  I don’t need to be lugging some heavy bag , no thanks!!!

Tomorrow I am going to attempt to give mama a perm.  Oh her hair is just way out of control, far beyond the normal “bed head” I know that much.  With my bumb thumb  I haven’t been able to tend to it very well.  She needs it cut, permed etc and I hope I can do it.  I am sure I can , nope let’s rephrase that I know I can.  If I convince myself that I can, then I can.  Yeah that’s the attitude to take isn’t it??? Yep see I get on here and can convince myself that I am “super woman” !! Well tomorrow will tell, if mama’s hair is screwy when I am done, then oopsie!!!!    Poor mama she wouldn’t have a  clue, but I would.  And besides you all know if your hair is done then you feel good, right??

Other than her perm guess it will be to get Bryce out there driving, driving, driving  so soon he can take his road test and then I WILL BE FREE!!!!!  No more student drivers in my life!!!!  YAHOO!!!!

Everyone have a great weekend, hope the sun shines in your area, cause it sure as heck isn’t going to shine over here waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyy out in WA!!!!

New Toy

Yeah hubby has been whining for a generator for a couple years now.  I mean I have never ever stopped him from getting one but never encouraged him to get one either.

Well yesterday it all changed.  Weather man forecast very high winds for tomorrow and nasty weather, so that did it for hubby!!! Off we went and when we got home he was one happy camper, I can tell you that much.

Now I told him if there’s no power outage this year he is definitely DOG MEAT to the max, hahaha.  So he says, “Well I bought you a refrigerator” mmmm that shouldn’t count should it?  I  am allowed new “toys” cause I am spoiled, but he isn’t!!!!  No he is spoiled too, we all are.   Personally I didn’t care last year or the year before or the year before , if he got a generator, it’s good to have. But shhhh don’t tell him that!!

One good thing, we can still bowl even with the power out now, the heck with the freezers and anything else.  Plug in that Wii and let’s bowl!!!!  Such a relief to know even mother nature can’t stop me from getting wii wii itis yeah I love it!!

Haven’t been doing a whole lot around here that’s why I haven’t written anything .  I think blog, then think, what do I write??!!  I have a non exciting life actually.  I don’t regret that I want it that way.  With mama it’s great that there’s no excitement.  Keeping her in routine is really so important.  She is happy, healthy and in routine she doesn’t get scared etc.  I do the same things at the same time everyday.

Oh in the mornings when she is sleeping I go out.  I go shopping, drs appts etc so I am not a  shut in with her.  It’s when I get her up and going on here day that I keep it the  same.  Her showers the same time, breakfast, lunch, supper etc.  Same shows on tv cause some she does recognize.  I sit with here with her and you know I enjoy it.  Hubby and the twins know the routine and alot of times they join us.  Now how lucky am I ??? Extremely right?  I have mama, the twins and hubby and we all get along and help each other , I love it.  Sometimes I look over at mama and she is like in a trance and looks sooooooooo lost, it breaks my heart.  I just reach over and start “playing” until I bring her back and get her giggling.  Oh wow what scares me the most is what if she goes in this “trance” and doesn’t come out????  I cringe and want to cry when I think of it.  I will keep her here no matter what it takes.   Love will prevail right????  My animals help her alot too.  They sense she needs company and the little dog Max sits on her lap all the time.  They share food and everything, ugh, but she loves it and hey at 90 what is going to hurt her right?  Bring on the doggie germs, anything to keep her happy.  My mama just like hubby can have anything she (they) wants.  If mama wanted a generator too hell we would get her one.  She has no idea what it is just told Ron it’s “cute.”  Don’t you love it??  To her everything is “cute” no matter how butt ugly it is.

See my life is not exciting but it’s certainly full.  It’s scrambled just like this post is.  I start off talking about hubby’s new toy and then go off that subject onto mama.  I am an air-head OH NO!!!! Don’t stop reading my blog you just never know what will come out of my scrambled brain and onto the blog.    Hey maybe it’s Bryce’s driving that did this to me, ya think??  Everyone but Kelly M can answer that one.  Kelly M knows me too well and she will try to convince you all that I was an air-head long before Bryce got behind the wheel.   Can’t listen to her nope she has too much info about me!!!!

Well it’s time to hit the knitting again.  Gotta put the computer down now, I have spent way too much time on here.  But reading blogs takes time and I love to read all of them.  You are all great people and if anonymous gets on anyone else’s blog, dang just ignore them.  I get so angry when they “invade” and then are rude on top of that.   Get a life anonymous!!!

STUDENT DRIVER

Okay is there anyone out there that wants to trade places with me for a little while??  PLEASE??? Any takers??  I only need you long enough for Bryce to get his drivers license.   Yeah dang I knew that would scare you off.

Ugh this will be my last “student driver” I can tell you that much!!!  The older I get the more my nerves fray and fray fast.  The new cars well the “oh shit” handle isn’t the greatest and the brake on the passenger side so doesn’t work.

He has been through drivers ed way back when he was 15 1/2 and yeah he is 18 plus now.  Stopped trying to learn for a few years and now wants his license.

I have been letting him drive to and from work but it’s like a straight shot, easy going and he has been showing me that he wants to drive this time.   More relaxed taking pointers etc.. Yeah so today it was okay time for the freeway, not one but THREE different ones!!!  In the rain, lots of traffic, what the hell, am I nuts????  I think so.

I tell him, when you see brake lights, that would mean slow down. Just because you are on the freeway doesn’t mean you go 60mph continuously.  He says okay and continues to do 60.  I see the bottle neck of traffic getting closer and closer , more and more brake lights, and Bryce cruising towards them at 60.  So I tell him “slow down” no reaction, so tell him a little firmer “slow down” nadda. The last time I about YELL SLOW DOWN!!!!!!!  Okay he does AND GETS MAD AT ME!!!!!!  Yeah I about reached over and decked the boy out, but I totally valued my life at that moment.  So I shut up, haha only after he slowed down!!  Once we arrived at the doctors office, I calmly, haha can you believe it, me calm??  I calmly explained to Bryce that one driving is a privilege, two I was being nice to let him practice on my car and with me and three if he can’t do what he’s supposed to, hand over the keys and he will never get behind the wheel of my car again.

Nothing else said we take mama in for her check up.  MM he must have thought about all I said because I did receive a heartfelt apology from him and he did awesome on the way home.  WHEW another day of lessons behind me, but dang it’s hard.  I tell ya, don’t let any of your kids drive okay?  Teaching them is way to nerve wracking.  They start the car, you panic, they step on the gas your hear rate speeds up.  They get out on the road and you are in full fledge panic, hyperventilate mode, trust me, I know.    So a word to the wise, keep all your darling children young, in toy cars and hide any and all car keys from them!!!!  If that doesn’t work, well jump on, and plead to all your fellow bloggers to teach them for you!!!

Me, I love having my feet right here in the livingroom, safe and I am never going on the freeway again!!!!

THANK YOU ALL

A huge thank you to all of you for your concern, caring and prayers!!! It worked!!! Surgery successful the doctor believes he got it all.  Results will be back in 10 days but the doc feels good about the surgery

My sister is home now and according to Kelly and my other sister, she is looking and feeling good!!!  WHEW WHEW WHEW is all I can say.  The power of prayer and great friends is just amazing.

Our dog Cassie is doing good too.  Her eye, well looks sore but they got it all which is good.  We have to give her pain pills twice a day and eye ointment.  She doesn’t like it but sleeps quite well once she takes her pill!!!

I am hoping that’s it for drs, etc well drs and vets that is.  And thank you Kellie for making sure Sheila isn’t licking her stitches!!!    We have to keep her in line don’t we?

Today was a day of relief to be honest with you.  No worries, no waiting just a huge sigh of relief and relaxation.

Yesterday another caregiver came in for mama.  I love her, she is good and I do mean good.  Can meet any of mama’s needs with ease.  There will be others coming in too, and I am hoping they will all be like this Lisa!!  Then I will go back home with peace of mind.  I leave here on the 26th and that’s creeping up fast.

I am getting caregivers to fill the hours of 11:30am to 9:30pm.  They will get mama up, showered, etc and keep her company and do for her while Ron, Bryce and Ashley are at work. Also get mama ready for bed and tucked in.  That will take a load off Ron and the kids and me.  If I get all great caregivers then yep my week back east will be relaxing.  I will be there for Sue on the anniversary of the death of her husband, and be able to see Sheila and let her know just how much support she has.  Plus I will have time for me.

I love mama to pieces and love doing for her, but for one week I will only have me to think about.  Does that sound selfish of me??  I don’t mean it to be, but in all honesty a mini vacation will be nice.  I will come back home raring to go and continue on caring for mama.  I don’t think taking one week a year is all that bad, I hope it isn’t.

I am looking forward to seeing everyone back east and just hanging out.  Kellie wish you were closer to SL then I could see you too!!!  One of these days we will hook up, I just know it.

Thank you all once again and actually over and over for all your support shown toward Sheila and Kelly, great blogging world, isn’t it????

WAITING

Yeah today is the day of my sister’s ( Kelly’s mom) surgery!!!  I called NY at 6am our time, which over there was 9am thinking she would be in recovery.  Yesterday my sister called and told me surgery would be around 8am.  So I call and damn it, they moved it to 12:20pm, grrrrrrrrrrrr.  So now it’s like 2pm NY time and I am still waiting!!!  I so wish I could have been over there with the family, damn the miles between us.  Instead I have to sit here wait and pray, which trust me we are all doing.

Not related but sort of , mmm. Yesterday took our white dog Cassie to the vet to have the bump on her eye checked.  We so thought Simba ( our brown dog) bit her, but that was way long ago, and the bump was just getting bigger.

So to the vet we go and find out the bump is a tumor on Cassie’s bottom eye lid. Benign the vet says, but it has to be removed.  If not it will continue to grow and eventually Cassie would lose sight in that eye.  Can’t have that , not if it can be prevented so took her in at 7am this morning for her surgery.  So yep waiting for her too.

I called my sister last night to let her know we are with her in spirit  and to tell her it will be OKAY, then had to get her laughing at least once, to lighten the mood.

I told her Cassie is having surgery too but after will have to wear a cone so she doesn’t lick the stitches.  So I asked Sheila if she would have to wear one too.  She did laugh over that one and said she promises not to lick her stitches.  It was good to lighten the mood for a bit.

Then Brandi my daughter told me she talked to both Kelly and Sheila and made it a “light” conversation.  They needed that even one laugh is better than none, right?

Right now I am not laughing I am restraining myself from pacing the floor just waiting for the dang phone to ring.  I want it to all be okay, get this behind her and have her move on.  Come on phone RING!!!!!!!

Life throws some miserable curves out huh?  I know they say everything happens for a reason, but right now I can’t figure out the reason for this happening to my sister.  It’s wrong, always happens to other families, but never ours.  Don’t we all say that over and over?  Well we can’t say that anymore but I do know we will be able to say and soon that Sheila is a breast cancer survivor!!!!!  Yep and she will be fine!!!!!

K gotta go, pace the floor I guess, don’t know what else to do, my mind is racing, heart pounding and I am getting myself all worked up, just THINKING!!!!!

Keep your prayers heading her way and thank you so much for them.

Can I Brag Now???

I am just so proud of Bryce, and oh wow has he come a long way from a few months ago.  Amazing what “dumping” the wrong girl will do for someone.  The old Bryc e is back!!

Today was MEPS day for the Air Force and his DLab test.  Okay here’s the bragging, he was the ONLY one to pass the DLab and he had the highest ASVAB score of all up there today.

Linguistic job isn’t available right now, but he is next in line for one.  So his next choice of job was ITS which is Imagery Tech Specialist.  That mainly is him relating all the satellite  images , including radar, infa red etc any image from the satellites.  That is the job he is slated in right now, and if the linguistic doesn’t have an opening he will leave here March 18th for basic training.  Another job he put down, which I so don’t like is EOD = Explosive Ordinance Disabling.  Yikes working with bombs, missiles, robotics etc. That one he would have sniper training too, just like being on the SWAT team.  Nope so don’t like that one, doesn’t sound safe to me.  I rather he take the ITS job, much better.

So now he says I signed up for SIX years instead of four!!  I was like “why?” He says “to get rank faster cause I will advance and then be at the point to test for rank. I intend to go to the top.” He is pumped and told me he knows it’s the right choice for him.  So pride , hell yeah.  He has come from hating the family and living for one girl, to this.  Wow huh?  Goes to show, never give up on people, they will always come around.

Now pride is high tonight but also so is fear, sorrow, and damn the hating the miles between my sister and I .  Read Kelly’s blog.  Prayers are needed for her and you know for Kelly too.  It’s tough to face, but hey strenght in numbers and oh for the power of prayer!!!!  My sisters surgery is Tues so let’s all pull together and get the vibes to her and her family. results.   Thanks all I know you are all ready praying and we have to keep the faith, right??